Leading Through Conflict? When to Call in a Mediator

If you're in HR, team leadership, or any kind of people management role, you've likely already had to handle your fair share of workplace conflict. It might start quietly — a misunderstanding, a misstep, a breakdown in trust. But left unaddressed, it can escalate and create real harm: to individuals, to team culture, to service users and to the organisation as a whole.

So, when is it something you can support internally — and when is it time to call in a mediator?

As a nationally accredited mediator, based in Brisbane, Queensland and conflict resolution trainer, I’ve worked across dozens of organisations helping teams manage complex staff issues.

Over the years, I’ve learned that bringing in a mediator doesn’t mean you’ve failed to resolve the problem — it means you care enough to manage it safely and professionally.

🧭 When should you bring in a mediator?

Here are some of the most common situations where workplace mediation can help:

1. The issue is stuck and keeps circling back

You’ve had several conversations, maybe even escalated it through HR, but the problem isn’t improving — it might even be getting worse. Mediation gives parties a new way to talk, guided by someone neutral, skilled, and focused on outcomes.

2. The situation is affecting mental health or wellbeing

If someone is taking stress leave, losing sleep, or feeling anxious about coming to work, it’s time to pause and reassess. I approach mediation with a trauma-informed lens and ensure that wellbeing is prioritised throughout the process. This includes identifying and managing risks to psychological safety.

3. There’s a risk of escalation, complaint, or legal action

Early mediation can de-escalate issues and resolve matters before they spiral into formal grievances or claims. This protects not only the individuals involved but also the broader team and organisation.

4. There’s a power imbalance

If one person is more senior, more outspoken, or holds more influence, this can make it difficult for the other party to feel safe or heard. A trained mediator can hold the space evenly and ensure the conversation is fair and constructive.

5. You need a safe, confidential, and structured process

Sometimes, people need to talk — but not in the middle of a team meeting, or with their line manager in the room. Mediation gives parties the chance to speak freely in a confidential, supported setting, with boundaries and structure that protect everyone.

6. You are too close to the problem

If you're a manager or team leader, you might be directly involved in the situation or simply too close to it to facilitate a fair and balanced conversation. Even with the best intentions, it can be hard for staff to speak openly when power dynamics or past tensions are at play. A mediator provides a neutral, confidential space where people can talk honestly — without fear of judgment or consequence — and with clear structure and support in place for everyone.

💡 The Cost of Mediation vs. the Cost of Conflict

Workplace mediation is a cost-effective way to address conflict early, before it escalates into formal complaints, legal disputes, or staff turnover. On average, my workplace mediations based in Brisbane, Queensland cost between $3,000–$5,000 — a small investment when you consider that unresolved employee conflict can cost an organisation tens of thousands of dollars, if not more. Factor in the hidden costs — lost productivity, hours of management time, stress leave, disengagement, and the cost of replacing staff — and the real impact quickly becomes clear. In the whole scheme of things, it’s a small cost to mitigate what is often one of the largest and most underestimated financial risks for many organisations. Mediation offers a practical, confidential, and respectful way to resolve issues before they cause lasting damage.

🤝 What does workplace mediation actually involve?

Here’s how I typically run the mediation process:

1. Intake and risk assessment

Each party is invited to a confidential one-on-one conversation with me. This is where I listen to their experience, understand what’s going on, and most importantly — assess whether mediation is the right and safe path forward. If there are risks to mental health or safety, we’ll talk through how those can be managed, or whether alternative pathways are better suited.

2. Preparation and process design

Mediation is not one-size-fits-all. I tailor the process based on what’s needed: a joint conversation, a shuttle model (where parties remain separate), or something more creative and gradual. We also agree on how the conversation will be structured, what’s in scope, and what’s out.

3. Mediation session

This is the core facilitated conversation. I create a respectful and safe space where each person is invited to share their perspective, listen to the other, and work through misunderstandings or issues. We might explore ways to rebuild trust, clarify roles, reset boundaries, or agree on next steps.

4. Agreement and follow-up

If both parties reach an agreement or shared understanding, we capture this in a document (non-binding, unless otherwise arranged). I may also recommend a follow-up check-in, coaching, or further support depending on the needs of the team.

Throughout the entire process, my role is to centre psychological safety, maintain neutrality, and help people move forward in a way that feels manageable, fair, and human.

🧠 Mental health and safety come first

I’ve worked with many teams where the conflict wasn’t just about performance or communication — it was deeply personal and emotionally charged. When mental health is involved, it’s essential to tread gently, with empathy and structure.

Mediation isn’t about forcing reconciliation. Sometimes the best outcome is clarifying boundaries or parting ways respectfully. The goal is always to support people to make decisions that preserve their wellbeing and dignity, whatever the future holds.

📘 Mini Case Study: When Mediation Made the Difference

Two senior staff members at a government agency had been working together for years but had reached a breaking point. Communication had stopped entirely, and the team around them was feeling the tension. One had taken leave due to stress. Their manager reached out for mediation, unsure whether they could even sit in the same room.

Through confidential intake conversations, I identified that both parties cared deeply about their work — and were burned out. We agreed on a structured conversation with clear ground rules and breaks built in. During mediation, they each had the chance to speak honestly, without interruption, and hear each other’s experiences.

By the end of the session, they had not only agreed on how to work together going forward, but they’d also requested follow-up coaching and a team workshop to improve broader team dynamics. It wasn’t about becoming friends again — it was about creating enough clarity and safety to move forward.

💬 Could this help your team?

If you're noticing early signs of conflict, a drop in morale, or repeated complaints — now might be the right time to explore mediation. It’s private, supportive, and designed to create space for a different kind of conversation.

I offer confidential consultations to explore whether mediation is the right fit. You can schedule a time to chat with me HERE.

I am based in Brisbane, Queensland and I am happy to meet in person here.  I also offer online sessions and travel across Australia and New Zealand.

P.S. You don’t need to have all the answers — and you don’t need to manage conflict alone. Sometimes the best leadership decision you can make is to bring in someone neutral to help.

Are you interested in learning more? Sign up for my free monthly sessions on skill building for workplace conflict management. REGISTER HERE

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Shiv Martin is a nationally accredited mediator, practicing solicitor, conciliator, decision-maker, and certified vocational trainer. With extensive experience in complex dispute resolution, stakeholder engagement, and team building across business, community, and governmental sectors, Shiv brings over a decade of unique and diverse expertise in Law, Management, Vocational Education, and Mediation.